I never had sex in high school. I didn’t even try. And the reason for this wasn’t just shyness or lack of self-esteem (although that was certainly part of it). The other reason, in retrospect, was snobbery. It wasn’t a conscious snobbery. It wasn’t as though I self-consciously thought that my sexually active classmates were stupid. But in retrospect, it’s obvious that I had picked up, from my peers and family, the idea that strong sexual feelings were the province of the unenlightened.
On the surface, middle class, educated, politically progressive families would not seem to be sex-negative. Conservative Christians have sexual values that are sex-negative, and they articulate these values (e.g. abstinence) openly. But educated, middle class progressives (I use the term “progressive” very loosely here) imagine themselves to be open-minded about all matters, including sexuality, and their rhetoric is usually sex-positive. Problem is, “enlightened” folks tend to be a lot more uptight about sexuality than they’d like to admit, and they tend to cover up these anxieties by pretending that sexual problems and feelings are only of great concern to the more lumpen elements.
Of course, what I’m offering here is nothing more that my own impression of how things are. It’s possible that I’m merely projecting my own experience onto everything. But if I had to bet, I’d say that the “educated” classes tend to be much less in touch with their own sexual feelings that they like to think, and often excessively intellectualize their thoughts about sexuality, to the detriment of honest self-examination.