Monthly Archives: January 2011

Machismo in drag.

Hanna Rosin, (more recently known for The End of Men), did a book review a few years back.  Her lead-in was as follows: A 19-year-old virgin walks into a bar. He’s got his lucky cross in his pocket and his … Continue reading

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But I was only trying to help.

In college I’d overheard him say something derogatory about me as though he thought I were some sort of tool, and realized then that the night before, when I’d seen him lying on the floor in one of the stalls … Continue reading

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“Because He Liked to Leer At It”

If you’ve seen The Vagina Monologues, you know that Bob, a character in the story, Because He Liked to Look At It, helped the narrator learn to love her vagina.  He did this by sharing with her the pleasure he … Continue reading

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Bob never got consent.

It’s hardly an overstatement to say that sexuality is a subject of great concern for many feminists.  Women, so the argument goes, have often been coerced into relationships or sexual acts that leave them feeling unsatisfied at best and, at … Continue reading

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Amy Chua, the deadhead, and the dutiful daughter.

We all have things we fear, and one of my fears is cancer.  I’m healthy, knock on wood, but I’ve sometimes wondered what it would be like to have a terminal illness, to go through nauseating rounds of chemotherapy and … Continue reading

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People who know who the perverts are.

One time, several years ago, I was riding on a bus at night.  The only other passenger was a middle-aged African-American woman who was muttering to herself about “perverts.”  She seemed mentally unbalanced, angry, and agitated, muttering about how the … Continue reading

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Is the concept of the “rape continuum” useful?

Words and concepts are only our best approximation of reality; we look for the closest fit to describe our world.  Human sexuality is complicated and subtle, and so the fit between words and reality is always going to be a … Continue reading

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